life at my fingertips

 …  that your co-workers have bizarre taste in guys.

So I’ve returned from Ottawa yesterday and am back to the grind this morning. Let me tell you, waking up at 6:30 am is a painful and brutal thing — no one should have to do it. In fact, it should be illegal. Henceforth, in MyWorld, 6:30 am wake-ups are illegal unless you are a employed in the health/emergency/police/travel industry.

Anyways, things have been slow (as you know) so my co-workers and I were chatting. One uses a dating service and showed me a photo of this guy who contacted her. The first thing I thought: Good God, what douchey tattoos. Here are what I categorize “douchey tattoos” to be (in anticipation of potentially offending anyone, I apologize):

• Anything tribal
• Anything with barbed wire
• Anything with flames
• Any half-naked chicks. Seriously. Mermaids, pin-ups, dancing girls, all that jazz
• Really badly drawn dragons/animals

He had all of them. All of them. His back had two half-naked dancing girls, he had tribal tattoos around his collar, bicep, and flames shooting down his arm. I fought the urge to gag.

My two co-workers were all, “Yeah, love the tattoos.”

My eyes bugged out of my head.

Suffice to say, between the three of us, those two will never be interested in any of the guys I’ll be interested in. And I will never ever be attracted to the guys they’re attracted to.

** Fun fact: when you type in “Douchey tattoos” on Google, pretty much everything I listed shows up. Ha! I win.